Getting Old Is Murder (Dell Mystery) by Rita Lakin

Author:Rita Lakin [Lakin, Rita]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780440242581
Publisher: Dell
Published: 2005-10-25T05:00:00+00:00

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16

Keystone Kops and Nosy Neighbors

Do you think we can make our getaway without anybody noticing?" Evvie is whispering, as if that would help.

We are walking very quietly down the stairs from my apartment on the third floor. "Ha ha," I say, "fat chance."

Ida's door flings open and she steps out onto the walkway. She sees us round the second floor stairwell and calls down to us over the banister. "Where are the Siamese twins off to now? First it was dinner, then breakfast. Now out to lunch I suppose?"

"Here we go," I say. "Send in the clowns!"

Evvie sighs. "If three-nineteen is out, can three-fourteen be far behind?"

And sure enough, Sophie's head pops out of her kitchen window. "So where is everybody off to?" she calls out.

"Maybe if we don't answer . . ." Evvie says softly.

"Dream on," I say.

From across the parking area, Bella's third-floor door opens and she peers out. "Am I missing something?" she calls out in her whispery little voice.

Evvie and I are now on the ground floor tiptoeing to the car. God bless them--they may be half deaf and half blind and well on their way to senility, but they don't miss a trick.

Now we pass the Feder apartment, 119, which is two doors away from my parking spot. Esther Feder is at her usual post, sitting in the doorway behind the screen, so the bugs won't get her. Which is actually a bizarre sight if you think about how she looks with her head pressed against the dark mesh partition. She raps at the screen to get our attention. "Where are you girls going in all this heat?"

Ida, the acrobat, now hangs over the balcony. "So, what's the big hurry?"

Sophie trills, "If you're stopping at Publix, maybe you'll bring me a pint of sour cream? I'll pay you back later." Which is a joke. Sophie borrows money from all of us, and we've yet to get a penny back. Ida calls that the lifestyle of the rich and disgusting.

The three-ring chorus is getting louder.

"We can't just ignore them. We have to tell them something," Evvie says.

"You're the writer. Make something up." I open the door and turn on the air so I can cool off the car.

"We're going out on blind dates," she calls out.

"That's the best you can come up with?" I say.

"Oh, yeah? They'd have to be desperate to want you old ladies." And now dear Hy, the snake charmer, comes out of his apartment carrying the garbage, adding his two bits.

All the clowns are laughing. The idea of us having dates is just too funny.

Ida especially loves this. "Who's your matchmaker, Yentl Frankenstein?"

Esther, excited, now pushes her screen door open so she can see better. "You got dates? Maybe you can fix my Harriet up?"

There is a loud clatter from inside the kitchen and Harriet appears quickly, wiping her hands on her apron. "Oh, Mom," she says, embarrassed. "Please!"

"Well, you told me to sit in the door and spy on them.

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